“The Wail of the Siren”
Written by Stanley Ralph Ross
Directed by george waGGner
Season 3, Episode 3
Production code 1708
Original air dates: September 28, 1967
The Bat-signal: The Siren has ensorcelled Gordon in his office with her mastery of the tone two octaves above high C. She has Gordon call Batman and tell him to go to a particular place—Gordon himself suggests Barbara’s apartment.
When he does so, Dick expresses confusion as to why he would want them to go there, never mind the fact that Gordon met the two of them at Barbara’s apartment just last week. Our heroes slide down the poles and head out in the Batmobile to Barbara’s building, parking in the underground garage.
However, Gordon doesn’t show up for the meeting, which also includes O’Hara. While Batman, Robin, Barbara, and O’Hara wonder what’s up, Siren instructs Gordon to hide in the trunk of the Batmobile. His task is to learn Batman and Robin’s secret identities and glean the location of the Batcave.
At her hideout in a grotto, Siren expresses her admiration for the evil women of history and literature, like Mata Hari, Lady Macbeth, and Lucrezia Borgia, rather than the good ones like Florence Nightingale and Molly Pitcher. Her goal is to ensorcell Bruce Wayne and expose Batman and Robin’s identities.
The party at Barbara’s place breaks up. Batman and Robin head to the Batcave to see if the Bat-computer can provide answers, O’Hara heads back to the office, and Barbara decides to investigate the chanteuse who’s in town named Lorelei Circe, for reasons the script doesn’t bother to provide. Barbara changes into costume and heads out, accompanied by her very own theme song, which probably won’t make your ears bleed…
Batman and Robin return to the Batcave (along with their surprise passenger). After the Bat-computer fails to provide any leads (it’s only programmed with information about criminals), they head upstairs to get some food, leaving Alfred to dust the cave. Gordon then pops out of the trunk (why he waited this long to do so is left as an exercise for the viewer) and quickly deduces that Alfred is both Bruce Wayne’s butler and the voice that answers the Bat-phone, so Bruce and Batman must be one and the same. But before he can call Siren to report this intelligence, Alfred takes him out with a spray can of bat-sleep and brings him upstairs (by hand, without help—take that, Sean Pertwee!).
While Bruce, Dick, and Alfred try to figure out what to do, Siren calls Wayne Manor and uses her voice to ensorcell Bruce. At her direction, he goes to the Wayne Foundation, to the confusion of Dick and Alfred. Batgirl then calls on the Bat-phone from Gordon’s office. Somehow she’s figured out that Siren is going after Bruce and can captivate men over the phone. Dick tells her to meet him at the Wayne Foundation, and is evasive when she asks if Batman will be there, too.
At the foundation, Bruce goes into the wall safe—hidden behind a painting of a wall safe (well, everything else in Gotham is labelled!)—and hands over his ready cash and family jewels, and also signs over his assets to Siren. Now she just needs to know Batman’s identity, so she calls Gordon’s office—but, of course, Gordon’s still asleep in Wayne Manor. O’Hara answers the phone so Siren ensorcells him and tells him to literally go jump in a lake.
Robin and Batgirl show up. Siren’s voice doesn’t work on Batgirl at all, and Robin’s wearing bat-earplugs—however, Siren now owns the building, so she kicks them out. Our law-abiding heroes do as they’re told, but Robin leaves a bug behind. They hear Siren order Bruce—now a penniless fop—to jump off the roof.
However, Batgirl and Robin arrive on the rooftop just in time to stop Bruce from committing suicide, and then fisticuffs ensue. Siren winds up dangling off the roof, and Robin is only willing to pull her up if she cures Bruce—which she does with an antidote note that’s three octaves above high C. It reverts Bruce to normal, but destroys her voice forever.
Batgirl rescues O’Hara from the lake, and then Gordon is reawakened in his office, not remembering anything of what happened when he was under Siren’s spell, to Batman and Robin’s visible relief. Siren is taken off to jail, while the Bat-computer provides an alert that Penguin is back in town, and he’s got an accomplice…
Fetch the Bat-shark-repellant! The Bat-computer has a resistance light that goes on when it’s confronted with a question it can’t answer. Batman keeps bat-sleep near the phone for whatever reason. Robin wears bat-earplugs that can block any sound over 14,000 deciBels—which is irrelevant, as it isn’t the volume of Siren’s voice that has the effect, it’s the frequency, not to mention that no sound on Earth is higher than 194 dB.
Holy #@!%$, Batman! “Holy one-track-Bat-computer mind!” Robin on-the-noses when they realize that the computer can’t answer a question about Gordon because it’s only programmed for criminals. “Holy stand-stills!” Robin grumbles when the elevator at the Wayne Foundation is irritatingly slow. “Holy fourth amendment,” Robin sighs when Siren kicks them out of the Wayne Foundation that she now owns.
Gotham City’s finest. While enslaved by Siren, Gordon finally puts together the evidence that’s been in front of his face all these years: that Bruce and Dick are Batman and Robin, with Alfred, to whom he talks all the friggin time on the bat-phone, being the bog-obvious connection, thus proving that he’s a better cop when mind-controlled than he is normally.
Special Guest Villainess. After her cameo last time, Joan Collins is front and center as Siren, a role that was actually written specifically for her. She’s the first of several one-and-done villains created for the third season, though she will be seen again in a non-speaking role in the animated film The Return of the Caped Crusaders.
Na-na na-na na-na na-na na.
“Oh Bruce, if only you were more like Batman.”
–Batgirl making an unintentional funny.
Trivial matters: This episode was discussed on The Batcave Podcast episode 51 by host John S. Drew with special guest chum, Glenn Greenberg, author, journalist, critic, and former Marvel Comics editor.
Stanley Ralph Ross already knew Collins well, as he had collaborated on a musical with her husband, Anthony Newley.
While Siren claims the note she’s using is two octaves above high C, which would still make it a C, the actual note that’s played when Siren uses her voice is an F#. She also says that the antidote note, which is three octaves above high C, would destroy her voice, despite Barbara earlier saying that Siren had a range of seven octaves.
Collins is best known for her role on Dynasty as Alexis, as well as her role as Edith Keeler on one of the best episodes of the original Star Trek, “The City on the Edge of Forever.”
Pow! Biff! Zowie! “Whose baby are you, Batgirl?” This is a fun little episode, remarkable for the fact that Batman is utterly irrelevant to it. Batman’s sole contributions to this episode are to drive to and from Barbara’s apartment and to fail to get the Bat-computer to work right. After that, Bruce spends the bulk of the episode mind-controlled.
No, this one is entirely the Batgirl and Robin show, which actually works quite nicely. Robin insisting on obeying the law and not trespassing on Siren’s property (never mind that the papers Bruce signed haven’t been filed with anyone yet, so her ordering them off the property is unenforceable at that moment) is a hundred percent in character, and I like that he leaves a bug behind to set up the climactic fight.
It’s less clear how, exactly Batgirl figured out what she figured out, but it at least gets the plot moving. And the rooftop fight is a joy, as both Robin and Batgirl are obviously having fun—and so are Burt Ward and Yvonne Craig. Plus, we get a little bit of nastiness in Robin once he’s out of Batman’s shadow—he gets to beat up on Bruce a little bit and then extorts Siren for Bruce’s cure, going so far as to threaten her life.
Plus in Joan Collins’s Siren we have an excellent bad guy, and our first real super-villain! Siren is the first Bat-villain to actually have a super-power of any kind. It’s used to good effect, too—I think we’ve all wanted to tell O’Hara to go jump in a lake at various times—plus her plan is actually quite brilliant, both using Gordon to dope out Batman’s secret ID and getting Bruce to sign over his wealth to her. It almost works, too, and it probably would have if Batman and Bruce weren’t actually the same person, which she couldn’t have known going in…
Bat-rating: 8
Keith R.A. DeCandido‘s latest release is the Super City Cops novella Avenging Amethyst, the first of three novellas about police in a city filled with costumed heroes and villains published by Bastei Entertainment. Full information, including the cover, promo copy, ordering links, and an excerpt can be found on Keith’s blog. The next two novellas, Undercover Blues and Secret Identities, will be released in January and February.
Perhaps she was lying?
I like this episode a lot, mostly because of Joan Collins. I think she was believable and did a good job of selling a high-concept, super-powered villainess. She took it seriously enough that Siren seemed like a credible threat, rather than merely a figment of a writer’s imagination.
I’ll admit the plot has some holes, especially a humongous one at the start. Why doesn’t Siren simply pick up the red phone and immediately put Batman under her spell? I don’t know, especially considering that in Stanley Ralph Ross’ original outline, she does just that (after Gordon has left the office for the day) and puts both Batman and Robin under her spell. She then commands them to jump off Gotham City Bridge.
The other part of her original plan partly is a nod to the sirens of antiquity. She uses her note to cause several ‘small ships’ to wreck along the coast. The ships apparently were transporting hi-fi equipment (I know, just work with me on this) and Siren needs that equipment so she can broadcast her note from atop a building later.
Still, as krad wrote, her plan in this one is pretty good. I’d add that wanting to know Batman’s identity harks back to some terrific season 1 episodes, such as Joker’s first appearance and the pilot with Riddler.
As for Batgirl, the most confusing thing is that in the previous episode, she came FACE-TO-FACE with Siren, with Riddler helpfully calling Siren by her criminal name. How come Barbara/Batgirl doesn’t bring this up at all in this episode??
Thanks for clearing up what the actual ‘stunning note’ is. I know the stunning note can be annoying to some, but I suspect it was done that way for two reasons. Obviously, Joan has never been known as a singer, so they couldn’t really use her real voice for the high note. Plus, given the lack of time in a single episode, it was a quick way to advance the plot.
Had it been a two-parter, perhaps they would have looked for a singer-actress of the time, say Julie London or Barbara McNair, for the role. And a Siren played by an accomplished, proven singer could have taken her time putting men under, and done an actual song, or at least a snippet of one. I can’t see them using Eartha Kitt, considering she was earmarked to be the new Catwoman. If they wanted a comedic Siren who actually could sing, Dorothy Provine could have worked.
Still, I think Joan was the best choice.
This one is surprisingly good for season 3. The Siren’s plan for Bruce is really ruthless, and the rooftop fight is pretty effective, with the added threat of a mind-controlled Bruce. And it’s a great showcase for Batgirl in action. Craig’s Batgirl always had so much fun fighting crime. She just had this huge grin on her face the whole time. Yvonne Craig really brought so much to this show — it’s a shame it lost so much else at the same time.
Joan Collins was stunning here. The Siren is also notable as one of the few villains in the show known by both a nom de crime and her real name, Lorelei Circe (assuming that isn’t an alias — it does have a sort of “P. N. Gwynne” quality to it). Her schtick is a bit derivative — Marsha, Queen of Diamonds was also a mind-controlling femme fatale who got Commissioner Gordon under her spell. But she’s got a good plan to expose Batman’s identity, and she would’ve gotten away with it if not for that meddling butler.
Bruce saying that they were subject to the orders of their superior officer (Gordon) was pretty weird. I mean, it’s technically true that they’re duly deputized officers of the law and thus subject to his authority, but in practice, Gordon is always subservient to them.
As I mentioned last week, the opening blends well with the end of last week’s episode, which is unusual for the third season. But there’s a bit of an inconsistency, because we know Batgirl faced the Siren in the Riddler’s lair last week, but here, when Barbara makes her deductive leap about Lorelei Circe, she doesn’t give any clear indication that she remembers facing the Siren.
This is also the first time we hear the lyrics of the Batgirl theme song, and… Good lord. For all that Batgirl was seen to some extent as a feminist role model, that song alone almost cancels out the feminism. “Are you a chick with a tender warm embrace?” “Whose baby are you?” Egad.
Keith, I think it’s a bit broad to say that Siren is the first villain with a superpower of any kind. Some “superpowers” are technological, like Mr. Freeze’s freeze ray or Mad Hatter’s mesmerizing beam. There’s also Marsha’s aforementioned love potion and Black Widow’s mind-control device. As far as innate superhuman abilities, Egghead’s oversized brain and commensurate super-intellect might count. Technically Mr. Freeze’s ability to survive subzero temperatures is a metahuman power, although it’s more of a disability in normal conditions. And there were occasional hints that Catwoman had a nine-lives thing going on, given how many times she seemed to die and then came back. (Sometimes in a different body. Hey, Catwoman’s a Time Lady!)
ad: perhaps, but she only said it might destroy her voice, and it was in truth never stated directly whether or not it did…..
—Keith R.A. DeCandido
Not my favorite Season 3 ep, but in all likelihood the most ambitious, and that alone gets a ton of points from me.
I haven’t watched every episode from the preceding seasons, but I feel pretty safe in saying this is Robin’s big Crowning Moment of Awesome, the moment where he finally shows he can be a perfectly functional crimefighter beyond the Shadow of the Bat. Batgirl almost feels extraneous to the story, though even a shoehorned-in Yvonne is better than no Yvonne at all.
With the Siren, Joan Collins gives us what is perhaps the series’ most card-carryingly evil Special Guest Villainess (with the possible exception of Kitt’s Catwoman, who we’ll have to wait ’til next year for), and – in my opinion, at least – one of the creepiest. Most actresses on this show were pretty damn good-looking, but Collins’ beauty has a certain inhuman edge to it, which only gets pushed up to eleven when that cold, sharp eeeee comes out of her lips…
Forgot to mention I got a chuckle out of Bruce answering the phone as ‘millionaire Bruce Wayne’ instead of as ‘Bruce Wayne.’
Barbara figuring out what she figured out. Thinking it over though she met The Siren in the previous episode. Knowing she was still on the loose made her an obvious suspect and playin a hunch that she was Loralei Circle was typical Gotham City logic.
Apparently she never told Batman about The Siren, he acted as if he never heard of her.
Robin’s “Holy fourth amendment” may be a little too on the nose. It’s never bothered them before.
We haven’t had themed henchpersons in a while. Allegro and Andante aren’t all that wrapped up in the theme, but at least an effort was made.
The Siren’s costume is almost worthy of William Thiess. Not quite, a Thiess design would have had a couple of windows in it, but it’s close. And I think it may be made from the same material as Shahna’s costume in “Gamesters of Triskelion”.
Van Williams, star of TV’s ‘The Green Hornet,’ dies at 82
https://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/tv/van-williams-star-of-tvs-the-green-lantern-dies-at-82/2016/12/06/be05bc12-bbce-11e6-91ee-1adddfe36cbe_story.html
@4/krad: “Return of the Caped Crusaders” would suggest it didn’t, no? :D
@10/Idran Or it could suggest the producers were too cheap to pay Joan for the rights to her likeness and for a voice cameo! :D
The best part of the episode? Robin and Batgirl emerge from the broom closet where they have been listening to Siren’s plan to take Bruce to the roof, and head for the stairway, which Batgirl questions “The stairs?”, and Robin responds “Yes. You’re in good shape.” All those observational skills paying off for the Boy Wonder.
Re: answering the phone as “Millionaire Bruce Wayne”. I’ve maintained for a while that a) his full name in this show actually is “Millionaire Bruce Wayne”, given how he’s always referred to as such at first, then his middle name of “Bruce” is used. b) Similarly, one of his ancestors, who built the Manor, had the name “Stately Wayne”, thus it always being referred to as “Stately Wayne Manor”.
@13/Tom Galloway: But that would seem to mean that Robin’s full real name is His Youthful Ward Dick Grayson.
Christopher and Tom: Honestly, based on the evidence, Batman’s sidekick’s public codename is “The Boy Wonder,” with “Robin” as a nickname that only Batman uses, since almost nobody outside of Batman refers to him by the latter, and everyone refers to him either by the former or by a goofy nickname (“Bat-Boy,” “The Boy Blunder,” etc.).
—Keith R.A. DeCandido
2# Joan Colins pretty much ALWAYS the best choice!
The Siren could still have a seven octave range and have trouble hitting a note three octaves above middle C. Maybe she goes four octaves in the other direction but chooses not to because 1) low notes have no magic powers (except for communicating with whales) and 2) people keep asking if she’s a guy when she does that (Gotham logic: There are probably a lot of people there who could be easily confused about whether Joan Collins is a woman or not).
@17/Ellen: But the note that ruins Siren’s voice is three octaves above high C, not middle C. Just as the hypnotic note is two octaves above high C. High C, or Soprano C, is itself two octaves above middle C. In technical terms, it’s C-sub-6. So the hypnotic note would be C-sub-8, and the cure note would be C-sub-9. If her normal range is seven octaves and its cutoff is between C8 and C9, that would mean its lowest point would be between C1 and C2 (Low C). This would give her a singing range nearly equal in width to that of a piano, but shifted a bit higher, because C8 is a piano’s highest note and its lowest is A0, two notes below C1.
This is actually not far off reality. C8, or eighth octave C, is a note that very few soprano singers have ever been able to reach. Although it obviously can’t hypnotize people, or anyone with a piano could do it.
I wish Siren had gotten some throat lozenges, herbal tea, honey and lemon on the Gotham State Penitentiary black market and made another appearance in season 3.
One thing that’s always bothered me about this episode from an admittedly nit-picking view–obviously, The Siren is quite evil and certainly deserves to go to jail.
But what would the charges be?
Let’s say, for argument’s sake, she has regained at least some of her voice by the time of the trial and can actively participate in her defense. (In fact, if Siren has regained her stunning note, then we will need all-female judge, jury, courtroom security, etc.)
But anyway, my question, as I said, is this–what would the criminal charges be? Siren’s attorney could argue that Bruce simply gave her all his assets as a gift because he was so smitten by her, and as for the attempted suicides, well, people often say things like ‘go jump in the lake.’ Is it Siren’s fault O’Hara took the command seriously? (Just playing devil’s advocate the way her defense attorney might.)
I honestly don’t know what–if any–kind of statutes would be on the books to cover hypnotically-induced behavior. Like I said, I know it’s taking the whole concept to an extreme, but it’s always made me wonder.
@20/J.P.: Well, given the precedents set by the Mad Hatter, Marsha Queen of Diamonds, and Black Widow, I expect that there’s a fair amount of case law about hypnotic mind control by this point.
Hey, she’s a Gotham City Siren. :)
@8/DemetriosX I was remiss in not seconding your comment. Siren’s ‘mod’ Greco-Roman gown definitely had a Bill Theiss vibe to it, no question, minus a side aperture, as you indicated. In my mind, it kinda made up for Joan having to be clothed and coiffed so drably as the doomed, saintly social worker in her iconic Star Trek ep.
I saw Collins’ Batman eps first in syndication, and when I found out she did a Trek, I was thinking, wow, she must have been a spectacular alien goddess. Not quite.
@23/J.P.: I realized a while back that Joan Collins was miscast as Edith Keeler. That character was written as someone earthier, more working-class and street-tough, and a posh-accented, ethereal beauty like Collins was kind of a mismatch.
@24/CLB I think Joan gave a good performance, but I cannot deny it was an odd piece of casting, especially because Joan made no attempt to hide or tamp down her accent. An English-accented social worker in 1930 NYC was somewhat strange.
What Trek role(s) do you think would have fit Joan better? I could have seen her in the Antoinette Bower role in Catspaw.
@24/CLB So are you saying Joan Collins shouldn’t have been on Star Trek, period? As I said, I thought it was a fine performance on her part.
@26/J.P.: No, I’m just saying that, while Collins did a reasonably good job, I’ve realized that an earthier, more working-class sort of actress would’ve been a better fit to the part as scripted. That has nothing to do with the rest of the series, because I’m only talking about the specific character of Edith Keeler and how she was written.
Is this the only time on the series that Alfred and Commissioner Gordon meet?
GusF: No, Gordon’s been to stately Wayne Manor more than once on the show.
—Keith R.A. DeCandido
The Batcomputer surveillance system shown in the tag is simultaneously creepy and Orwellian, but also totally confusing. So Batman has a gadget that constantly sweeps the city for the sound of his adversaries speaking and automatically relays it to the Batcave, yet at the same time he never knows what they’re planning or where their hideouts are? Hmmm.
@30/Craverguy: The tags were very clumsy ways of setting up the next episode, and they were often ignored/contradicted by the next episode (because they were often shot weeks or months later, since the episodes were produced and aired in different orders). So I prefer to disregard them as “real” parts of the series. They’re more just stylized previews.
Yeah, of the tags we’ve seen so far, the only one that actually worked in setting up the next episode was the Siren’s……
—Keith R.A. DeCandido
Seems very similar idea to Marsha and her love potions. And if the effects wear off, as with Gordon and O’Hara, why does she have to sing a special note to release Batman?
@33/Matt: “And if the effects wear off, as with Gordon and O’Hara, why does she have to sing a special note to release Batman?”
Perhaps because Bruce was still under the compulsion to commit suicide, and they couldn’t take the risk that he might try again before the compulsion wore off naturally.